Raw is the word I would like to choose as my mantra; it’s the open wound I call my heart. A source of pain, love, encouragement, beauty and fear. But without a reservation, there is a self-loathing in which I’ve embraced, a voice that has opened a gaping hole. Raw and waiting to be told I’m not good enough, this hole is my self-doubt. But it is her, self-doubt, that is the asshole inside me, and she’s the real enemy.
Don’t let her bring you down, she’s a bitch, self-doubt, it’s time you put her in her place. There isn’t a squad cheering her on, it’s her you feed, the rest are vultures swooping in for the scraps you leave them. They’re nursing on your insecurities as to satiate their personal uncertainty and aversion.
Goodbye mean girl, it’s time I tear you from my confidence, and let you free, you don’t deserve a place inside this delicate heart.
You aren’t what she claims; you are strong, beautiful and able. You have spent a life permitting her to put you down, accepting what she sees as the truth, she is wrong, you are worthy.
She’s incorrect when she whispers you aren’t a good enough Mom, even on your worst days you give love; it’s inside you, don’t let her place doubt in the ability you have as Mother. Find yourself in the cuddled kid on the couch, and kisses on scraped knees. Don’t forget you are only human on the days you find yourself crying on the floor in the kitchen corner. She’s mistaken, you CAN do this, you are more than the twinge of uncertainty she keeps carefully placing in your psyche.
She’s a liar; you are worthy of the love that doesn’t cut you down, your heart isn’t meant solely to feel pain. Quiet that voice in your head, and let her go, she’s evil, your heart is bursting, and it deserves acclamation. Stand up to her, she doesn’t know how powerful that heart of yours truly is, it deserves to be held by someone who sees it as perfection, you need to see it as perfection. Don’t settle in and listen to her words of contempt, you deserve to love yourself, and in doing so, will finally know what it’s meant to feel true love.
She’s unreliable, falsely spreading messages throughout your subconscious, steadily promoting her belief that you will never be beautiful enough. Shed your skin, and look genuinely into your soul, you are impressive, despite her disdainful words. Kick her from your wary essence, and place more value on who you are. She deserves less time consuming the virtue that resides inside all of what you are; she is not beauty, you are the beholder.
She’s mean, insisting you aren’t as good as your peers. Breathing down your neck, placing words there that station doubt in your ability. Embrace who you are and all that makes you distinct from the rest. Don’t let her nestle so close to what makes you unique, she’s the one fearing difference. Stand tall and be who you are, there is beauty in all that makes you diverse. Credit your uniqueness, it is what draws others to you.
She’s wrong; you are good enough, and she can’t take away the value in which is you. She’s a bitch, constantly playing against your confidence, placing doubt in everything you do. It’s time to say goodbye and trust in yourself; she’s done nothing for you, except replace your image with a cracked reflection of who you unquestionably are.
Being broken doesn’t require you to feel unworthy of love, lost doesn’t mean you can’t be found. Look inside yourself, be your own best friend and wear who you are as if it is the last outfit you will ever put on. You’ve been given one time to be you, the fuck-ups, the hurt, the pain you have caused, are the pieces of you. Tell that Bitch self-doubt to fuck off. She doesn’t deserve a place in that utterly gorgeous heart.
Goodbye self-doubt, I don’t need you here anymore, I never did.